Yesterday I received a package of documents. The intent of the document package was to try and convince me that I should contract a very specific service from the sender's company. There were some copies of their monthly newsletters, I now know the birthdates of most of their staff and that the Customer Service Manager just had a little girl that has been named Cynthia, although her brother wanted to name her Amanda, a corporate flyer giving the background of the company and a document, two pages, titled -

U.V.P.s - Unique Value Propositions

I must admit, as a marketer by heart, and a writer, I am probably more curious than most about the way a document is structured and the message it is trying to communicate to me. I proceeded to skim the document to discover its meaning and value. It turns out that a “U.V.P. Unique Value Propositions” document is supposed to tell me the benefits of dealing with this company versus their competitors.

After reading the document, I considered the knowledge and wisdom that had just been imparted to me. I quickly realized that there were a lot of things that I didn’t know! The document was chocked full of acronyms – acronyms without explanation, RFX suite of products, AQUA 2000 and GDS to mention only a few. There was at least one spelling mistake and one typo, the typo being quite serious, but funny. The document was supposed to say that they, the vendor, “create a management solutions package that’s right for your company”; instead, it said, “create a management solutions package that’s right for our company”.

Looking at some of the other parts of the document, always remembering that this is a sales pitch. First, it was supposed to give me the benefits of dealing with them. The word “benefit” does not appear anywhere on the document. The word “our” appears 6 times on the document and the word “your” appears once (after taking into account the aforementioned typo). Obviously, they being the “our” are more important than I am being the “your”.

On the bottom of each page (because it has been entered as part of the footer of the document and hence appears on the bottom of every page) they suggest that I contact the company, a great closing! Surprise, the only contact information provided is a website address – no telephone number, no street address, no email address.

The pages are not numbered in any manner, so it is actually possible that there is a 3rd, 4th, or even 5th page.

The very first section of the document tells me that they are dedicated to quality service and have implemented ISO 9001:2000. Reading the document did not give me the comfort feeling that they were dedicated to quality, if it left me with any specific feeling, what so ever, it was that they were sloppy and didn’t pay attention to detail. The service that they are so poorly trying to sell to me is highly dependent on them paying very close attention to detail.

Why did they get so creative with the name, “U.V.P. Unique Value Propositions”? Why not use the term “benefits” in the title of the document? Do companies believe that I have an unlimited amount of free time on my hands and that I will search their documentation in order to be educated on why I should do business with them? If they are going to use acronyms, that have no direct meaning outside of their own industry, why didn’t they at the least explain the acronym and how it is of benefit to me? Why wouldn’t they tell me how I benefit, me the most important person that I know, and yet all they did was tell me about themselves.

The biggest question in my mind, is why would they give me a document that obviously wasn’t proof read?

This document was supposed to give me the benefits of dealing with them and foremost make me want to contact them to engage them to perform services for my company. Instead, it gave me a chuckle and more important I now question their resolve in providing me with the services that I need.

Maybe you should read the documentation that you are sending out to prospective clients and customers. Are you motivating them to do business with you or to go to your competitors as quick as they can?